Our stay in the hospital was amazing! Our nurses where BEYOND amazing and NEVER once showed any judgement towards A(birthmom) or us.
One encounter I had with one of the nurses totally took me off guard and I KNOW it was a total God moment. It was EARLY Monday morning (Dec 7th), the morning nurse, Laura, had come in to check on Natalie and see how she was doing. After she got Natalie all wrapped back up she came over to my bed and said "I think this is amazing what yall are doing." I told her thank you but that we were just ordinary people. She began to tell me HER story...oh my heavens HOW GOOD IS GOD????
Our Nurse...well...SHE is a BIRTHMOM!!!!! Oh Praise you Jesus for this encounter. I was in total shock (I shouldn't have been...God does these types of things)! She had chosen adoption for her child 25 to 30 years ago (cant remember exactly...it was 5:30 in the morning)...she told me HER point of view on adoption, she told me about the day she met her daughter 25+ years after she had placed her for adoption...she told me her pain...her JOY...her peace! It was a moment I will be thankful for FOREVER!!! God totally knew she would be Natalie's nurse...and that we would be there for that moment. She taught me so much about birthmoms and the feelings they experience after they place their child in their forever families. It was a priceless conversation.
On Monday afternoon A was discharged from the hospital...we couldn't leave yet cause it hadn't been 48 hours. She wanted to go home and so our agency was going to go to her house, let her sign, then come back to the hospital and let us sign!!! It was a whirlwind!
We were getting Natalie all prepped to head back to Corpus when there was a knock on our hospital room door. I went to the door and it was A's friend...she was coming to let me know that A wanted to say bye before she left. My heart started racing...I wanted to be tender with her and express how thankful I was (am) for her. I walked into the hallway and there she was...a precious woman...who had just given birth to a precious little girl. Tears started trying to flow...but I tried really hard to be strong. I gave her a hug and told her I loved her so much. She hugged back and said that she knew we would love Natalie and she knew we loved her. I started crying and she grabbed me by the shoulders and said "we aren't gonna do this...cry...Im going to be okay." At that moment I wanted to cry EVEN MORE!!! Holy cow what an amazing girl she is...she wanted to be strong for ME...yet she was the one leaving the hospital after 9 months of pregnancy without her child...and now she was giving me permission to love, raise, and adore...her child...my child.
I walked back into our room and LOST IT....I mean UGLY CRY!!! The nurse and Jason were both heartbroken too...we all just looked at eachother! I LOVE LOVE our birthmom! I am thankful and grateful for her decision. Her leaving the hospital was HARD...it all became very real for Jason and me.
SIDE NOTE: Please don't talk about birthmoms as if they aren't humans LOVED by our gracious God...our society has a negative view of birthmoms...THIS MUST CHANGE! They aren't GIVING UP their child but instead they are choosing LIFE and then letting a family raise and love their child...that's BRAVERY!!!! So lets be careful how we view these precious women!
After A left the hospital we had some time together...just me, Jason and Natalie. We finished packing up and got her ready for the drive home. We took LOTS of pictures and just basically sat their and held her and loved on her...we didn't put her down hardly at all the whole time we were at the hospital. We had prayed for this very day for 2 1/2 years and now here we were...it was all happening BETTER than we had planned or prayed!
Stay tuned for Details of December Part 3....we had A LOT of things happen in December!!!!
Friday, April 23, 2010
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
Details of December Part 1
I was just upstairs loving on our precious 4 1/2 month old little bundle of sweetness and this overwhelming since TO BLOG came over me...I gotta get Natalie's story down on paper! Its hidden in my heart and talked about daily...but gotta get it documented!
So here are the details of December:
On December 2nd we found out that our birthmom (going to call her A through this post) would have a csection on Wednesday, Dec 9th @ 12:30pm in Houston. Our plan was to go to Houston on Dec 8th, get a hotel, REST, and then be at the hospital early Wednesday morning to be with A and love on her while she was getting ready to go in for the csection. I had EVERYTHING PLANNED for Tuesday-Friday...Jax was all taken care of with friends and we were set and ready to go!
My grandparents decided that the would make a quick trip to visit us the weekend before Natalie was to be born. They flew in on Dec 5th and were planning on flying back on Dec 7th. My nanny several times said "I just think something is going to happen if we come...like the baby might be born or something." WELL....Dec 5th (Saturday) we were all gathered watching the Texas Longhorns FIGHT HARD to win the championship (booo that didnt happen...poor Colt! Love that dude)...I had just told everyone..."okay, I'm not getting up again, I want to sit here and watch the game." Right after I said that I checked my email and went in to total shock mode!!! We had an email from our agency letting us know that A had gone into labor and was at the hospital and was having her csection TONIGHT!!!! I totally paused and then started freaking out...read the email to Jason, Jax and my nanny and pawpaw! We just all looked at each other and had NO idea what to say or do!!! (My Nanny mumbled something under her breath...Im sure she said..."I knew I was right"...LOVE YOU NANNY)
I got on the phone with our agency and they informed me that everything was fine but she had gone into labor...and for us to meet our case worker at the hospital in Houston on Sunday. So we packed our bags, made phone calls to get Sunday services covered...CRIED...freaked out...CRIED...made more phone calls...PRAYED....CRIED!!! I was in total awe of this very moment!!!
So there we are at our home while our precious birthmom was delivering our precious child. AND the PLAN was for us to be there when she was born so we could be the first ones to hold her...but NOW...WHO was going to hold her and tell her how much she was loved!!! I just couldn't fathom the thought of our precious daughter in the hospital nursery with NO one to love on her. Right then I started begging and pleading with the Lord that HE would be RIGHT there speaking truth over her. I got on the phone with friends and asked them to pray too!! I knew A had decided not to see Natalie because she thought it would be too hard...so I just begged God that he would comfort A and Natalie since I wasn't going to be there to show love to both of these precious girls...our birthmom and our child. (As if I thought I HAD to be there to comfort...I cant wait to tell you what happened)
We didn't sleep hardly at all that night! We got up early and headed to Houston and my grandparents stayed with Jackson. HELLO BLESSING! We made our way to Houston but first stopped off at a Whataburger in Portland to get loved on by one of my precious prayer warriors, Donna Brown! We had forgotten to take Jackson's booster seat out of my car and my grandparents needed it and she was going to take it to them! BUT then she gave us a personalized Christmas ornament with ALL of our names on it...even Natalie's! OH MY HEAVENS...it became real! I'm pretty sure we prayed right there in the parking lot...Donna Brown prays...it doesn't matter where you are!
Our drive to Houston was AMAZING! Since it was Christmas time the radio stations were all playing Christmas Music...OVER AND OVER again we got to hear about the birth of our SAVIOR...the very SAVIOR who had orchestrated our miracle! Oh what a priceless time...I kind of wish I could go back and relive that day all over again. I was changed that day...and I will always be grateful for what God did in our hearts...how he so tenderly loved me enough to bring me and Jason to the place of adoption...what an HONOR to serve our KING by loving and raising his children.
We arrived at the hospital and met our case worker! She let us know that we would be able to STAY at the hospital in our own room with Natalie!! What a huge blessing! We were going to be able to have our daughter in our OWN room for her stay at the hospital.
We got to look through the hospital nursery window and could see Natalie with a cute Santa hat on. We couldn't SEE her face and features though so we were DYING to see her! The nurses got us all settled in our room...all the security wrist band stuff...and then while they were prepping Natalie to be brought to us...I got to go have a visit with A. ***This was priceless to me!!! I was amazed at how well she was doing. The first question she asked me was "Have you seen her yet"...I said no and she said "Well hurry back to your room so you can go love on her." So I loved on A just a bit more then headed back to our room.
Just a few moments later the nurses rolled Natalie Grace into our room! OH MY OH MY!!!!!!! I was SO not prepared for what took place in my heart that VERY moment I saw her...it was INSTANT LOVE!!! Not "Oh I will have to grow to love her", Not "we gotta bond", Not "I love her but it doesn't feel like she is mine yet." NOPE instant LOVE (the same love Jesus has for us)! I was amazed at how beautiful she was (is) and Jason and I couldn't take our eyes off of her! SERIOUSLY one of the BEST BEST days of my life!
THEN...all the nurses left our room...our case worker left...and it was just us 3! Oddly enough I didn't cry one tear...I think I had emptied my tear bank on Saturday! I was just oozing JOY...this was the day that I had prayed, fasted, cried and begged God for and WOW did he deliver!! Jason and I couldn't stop taking pictures and texting them to every living being...we wanted EVERYONE to see how GOOD God was being to us...so undeserving and yet he was just pouring the blessings on THICK!!! The Holy Spirit showed up that day in our hospital room...and stayed until we were discharged from the hospital. There was a covering of peace for those 2 days we were there. We KNEW that the there was still a possibility that A could change her mind (in TX birthmoms have 48 hours and then they can sign to terminate rights) but we were appointed for the time being to LOVE and ADORE this precious gift. She didn't leave our sight but twice to go to the nursery. The nurses were fabulous! They just oooo and awwed over her and wanted to hear our story! It was a sweet sweet time...a time that I will always TREASURE! God is good people...so good!!!!
The Details of December just keep getting better and better...but first some pictures:
(I cant upload any of the pics cause Jason has them on his computer...so for now use this link)
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2044694&id=1411837543&l=07adfcdfbc
Details of December Part 2...coming soon!
So here are the details of December:
On December 2nd we found out that our birthmom (going to call her A through this post) would have a csection on Wednesday, Dec 9th @ 12:30pm in Houston. Our plan was to go to Houston on Dec 8th, get a hotel, REST, and then be at the hospital early Wednesday morning to be with A and love on her while she was getting ready to go in for the csection. I had EVERYTHING PLANNED for Tuesday-Friday...Jax was all taken care of with friends and we were set and ready to go!
My grandparents decided that the would make a quick trip to visit us the weekend before Natalie was to be born. They flew in on Dec 5th and were planning on flying back on Dec 7th. My nanny several times said "I just think something is going to happen if we come...like the baby might be born or something." WELL....Dec 5th (Saturday) we were all gathered watching the Texas Longhorns FIGHT HARD to win the championship (booo that didnt happen...poor Colt! Love that dude)...I had just told everyone..."okay, I'm not getting up again, I want to sit here and watch the game." Right after I said that I checked my email and went in to total shock mode!!! We had an email from our agency letting us know that A had gone into labor and was at the hospital and was having her csection TONIGHT!!!! I totally paused and then started freaking out...read the email to Jason, Jax and my nanny and pawpaw! We just all looked at each other and had NO idea what to say or do!!! (My Nanny mumbled something under her breath...Im sure she said..."I knew I was right"...LOVE YOU NANNY)
I got on the phone with our agency and they informed me that everything was fine but she had gone into labor...and for us to meet our case worker at the hospital in Houston on Sunday. So we packed our bags, made phone calls to get Sunday services covered...CRIED...freaked out...CRIED...made more phone calls...PRAYED....CRIED!!! I was in total awe of this very moment!!!
So there we are at our home while our precious birthmom was delivering our precious child. AND the PLAN was for us to be there when she was born so we could be the first ones to hold her...but NOW...WHO was going to hold her and tell her how much she was loved!!! I just couldn't fathom the thought of our precious daughter in the hospital nursery with NO one to love on her. Right then I started begging and pleading with the Lord that HE would be RIGHT there speaking truth over her. I got on the phone with friends and asked them to pray too!! I knew A had decided not to see Natalie because she thought it would be too hard...so I just begged God that he would comfort A and Natalie since I wasn't going to be there to show love to both of these precious girls...our birthmom and our child. (As if I thought I HAD to be there to comfort...I cant wait to tell you what happened)
We didn't sleep hardly at all that night! We got up early and headed to Houston and my grandparents stayed with Jackson. HELLO BLESSING! We made our way to Houston but first stopped off at a Whataburger in Portland to get loved on by one of my precious prayer warriors, Donna Brown! We had forgotten to take Jackson's booster seat out of my car and my grandparents needed it and she was going to take it to them! BUT then she gave us a personalized Christmas ornament with ALL of our names on it...even Natalie's! OH MY HEAVENS...it became real! I'm pretty sure we prayed right there in the parking lot...Donna Brown prays...it doesn't matter where you are!
Our drive to Houston was AMAZING! Since it was Christmas time the radio stations were all playing Christmas Music...OVER AND OVER again we got to hear about the birth of our SAVIOR...the very SAVIOR who had orchestrated our miracle! Oh what a priceless time...I kind of wish I could go back and relive that day all over again. I was changed that day...and I will always be grateful for what God did in our hearts...how he so tenderly loved me enough to bring me and Jason to the place of adoption...what an HONOR to serve our KING by loving and raising his children.
We arrived at the hospital and met our case worker! She let us know that we would be able to STAY at the hospital in our own room with Natalie!! What a huge blessing! We were going to be able to have our daughter in our OWN room for her stay at the hospital.
We got to look through the hospital nursery window and could see Natalie with a cute Santa hat on. We couldn't SEE her face and features though so we were DYING to see her! The nurses got us all settled in our room...all the security wrist band stuff...and then while they were prepping Natalie to be brought to us...I got to go have a visit with A. ***This was priceless to me!!! I was amazed at how well she was doing. The first question she asked me was "Have you seen her yet"...I said no and she said "Well hurry back to your room so you can go love on her." So I loved on A just a bit more then headed back to our room.
Just a few moments later the nurses rolled Natalie Grace into our room! OH MY OH MY!!!!!!! I was SO not prepared for what took place in my heart that VERY moment I saw her...it was INSTANT LOVE!!! Not "Oh I will have to grow to love her", Not "we gotta bond", Not "I love her but it doesn't feel like she is mine yet." NOPE instant LOVE (the same love Jesus has for us)! I was amazed at how beautiful she was (is) and Jason and I couldn't take our eyes off of her! SERIOUSLY one of the BEST BEST days of my life!
THEN...all the nurses left our room...our case worker left...and it was just us 3! Oddly enough I didn't cry one tear...I think I had emptied my tear bank on Saturday! I was just oozing JOY...this was the day that I had prayed, fasted, cried and begged God for and WOW did he deliver!! Jason and I couldn't stop taking pictures and texting them to every living being...we wanted EVERYONE to see how GOOD God was being to us...so undeserving and yet he was just pouring the blessings on THICK!!! The Holy Spirit showed up that day in our hospital room...and stayed until we were discharged from the hospital. There was a covering of peace for those 2 days we were there. We KNEW that the there was still a possibility that A could change her mind (in TX birthmoms have 48 hours and then they can sign to terminate rights) but we were appointed for the time being to LOVE and ADORE this precious gift. She didn't leave our sight but twice to go to the nursery. The nurses were fabulous! They just oooo and awwed over her and wanted to hear our story! It was a sweet sweet time...a time that I will always TREASURE! God is good people...so good!!!!
The Details of December just keep getting better and better...but first some pictures:
(I cant upload any of the pics cause Jason has them on his computer...so for now use this link)
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2044694&id=1411837543&l=07adfcdfbc
Details of December Part 2...coming soon!
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